When it comes to the happiest, proudest, and most satisfied times in my life, it usually revolves around accomplishment, close relationships, and self-respect. And it is for those reasons I try to leave my life so that I live up to these values.

As an only child to a single mother who came to the US from Japan with language issues, I think for a long time I have learned to live alone. From that time period I spent a majority of my time alone, I have learned to understand myself through honest reflection. And I think this understanding and the opinions of close friends and family are how I gauge my self-respect and find pride in who I am.

I think one of the areas my habit of self-reflection has come in handy was for emotional hardships. From break-ups to deaths of loved ones, a strong gauge on who I was, was a strong anchor for me to weather through tough times. I think the last time I gave advice, was to a friend who was having a tough time with her own break-up and her frustration with the dating scene. The best advice I had was to focus on yourself, which is cheesiest of clichés I know. But if you knew when you were going to meet “the one,” maybe a year from now, what should one do? I would spend that time developing myself and establishing my career. I would pursue my passions and seek new experiences to enjoy alone so that in the end, I would be the best person I could be for the one I end up with. And the best way to measure your success in doing this is through self-reflection and self-respect. (Reference: "Forgetting Sarah Marshall" and literally every romantic comedy)

Self-reflection and respect is also my anchor to identify and battle stereotype threat. There are many stereotypes that revolve around the Asian race, and I try to ignore them as best I can, whether they are good or bad. I instead try and focus on what I want to be good at and how good I am at those things. I have always been good at fields that rely on an analytical mind and I know that there is a stereotype around Asians and math. However, I try not let that sway me to pursue or avoid the math field. You shouldn’t have to promote or break down stereotypes by fulfilling them or intentionally breaking them down. Doing either of those things can be seen as falling to the stereotype threat. The best, healthiest, and most sustainable way to battle stereotype threat is to identify who you are and pursuing that regardless of stereotypes. And I think a strong foundation of self-respect through self-reflection is the key to do that.

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